The Mirror of Erised
by IxlovexHP
Summary: Remus finds an old classroom with a strange mirror in the corner. What happens when he sees his heart's desire?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer- I don't own anything**

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><p>Year 1<p>

Remus crept down the silent corridors of Hogwarts, all the while looking out for Filch to come creaking down and catch him. Earlier, James had said that he thought he'd found another secret passageway, but McGonagall had caught him before he had a chance to check it out. Of course, James had run back to tell the others about it, and then said that he would be going back later, but he then found himself buried deep with essays and astronomy charts, so Remus offered. Right now, he was slightly regretting that decision.

He was pretty sure that he had taken a wrong turning at some point, and so trying to remember James' instruction would be futile. Instead, he decided to feel along the walls with his hands until he could find a classroom, to get his bearings hand caught a handle, and pushed it open, hoping it would be the Charms classroom, or somewhere he knew. Looking around, Remus felt disappointed; it was just an old classroom, with tables and chairs stacked up in the corner, no indication as to which classroom as it looked like it hadn't been used in years. Yet Remus felt that there was something distinctly off about it.

In the corner of the room there sat a magnificent mirror that was clearly out of place in the old classroom. Slowly edging towards it, he saw his reflection gradually rise up in the mirror. In the mirror, he was with Sirius, James and Peter, laughing and joking with each other. Gasping, he turned around to see if they were behind him. Had they been following him? But no one was there.

Brow furrowed, he quickly glanced back at the mirror to see that they were all there, and then looked behind him again. No one was there. He returned his gaze to the giant mirror, and to add to the surprise, saw that he looked different. He didn't have the scars that patterned his face and arms and his eyes were not the amber they had been since he was six, but instead a deep brown colour.

All of a sudden the moon began to rise in the mirror. _The moon?_ Even though it would not be possible for the moon to be in the classroom, he searched behind and above him to find nothing but the dusty walls filled with cobwebs. In the mirror, the moon was full, and he wanted to shout out to the Remus in the mirror to run, get away from his friends or he'll kill them! Yet the four figures simply stood there, all smiling and joking with each other, not noticing the moon that had risen ominously above them.

It took about five minutes before Remus realised that nothing would happen. The boy in the mirror was not going to become a dangerous creature and kill his friends. Nothing was going to happen. But how could that be? He scoured the mirror for any clue as to what the mirror truly showed, for Remus was certain that this was no ordinary mirror. He found an inscription at the stop:_ Erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi. _It wasn't much of a clue, thought Remus, and if it was, then he couldn't figure it out. So he turned his attention back to the reflection and watched himself talk with his friends in the moonlight.

There he sat, transfixed, until a rustling behind him got his attention. Looking at his watch, he saw that he had been gone for a few hours now. Jumping to his feet, he wiped the tears that he was ashamed to find on his face and ran back to the common room, not caring if he was caught. He lay in bed that night, unable to stop thinking about what he'd seen. He had figured out that the mirror showed himself how he'd be if he wasn't a werewolf, and it was saddening for him to see how happy and carefree he was.

He didn't tell his friends about the mirror. He couldn't because they didn't know about him being a werewolf, and that may just be the clue to them finding out, if they saw what he saw. He couldn't let that happen, he liked having friends and didn't want to go back to how it was before Hogwarts, the loneliness, the pain everytime the parents dragged their kids away from him. Instead, he told them that he wanted to keep looking for the passageway that James had seen. Luckily for him, they were busy with homework, work that Remus would overlook, in order to get to the mirror that night.

As he settled himself in the usual spot, in front of the mirror to watch himself do something that he will never be able to do, he heard a coughing from behind him.

"Professor Dumbledore! I-"

"So I see you've found the mirror of erised then Mr Lupin." Dumbledore's voice didn't sound harsh, or accusing, it sounded gentle, and he had the trace of a sad smile upon his face. "Do you know what it does?"

"It shows what you desire the most." Remus had figured this out while laying in bed, as he thought about the one thing he couldn't forget at the moment. That meant that none of his friends would be able to see what he saw, and therefore wouldn't help them to find out that he was a werewold, however he was having a rare feeling of selfishness, and didn't want to share the mirror with anyone else.

"Very good, I'm impressed. Do you know what the script above the mirror means?"

"No sir, I got the first word was 'desire' but I couldn't get anymore."

"It means, _'I show not your face but your heart's desire_. Now then, I strongly recommend that you do not return to this mirror. So many people have been so drawn in by it, that they waste away, or in some cases are driven mad by what they see, but cannot get."

"I can see why" Remus muttered to himself.

"Now why don't you head back to bed? I can see you haven't been getting much sleep lately." That was true. Remus' thoughts had been preoccupied with what he had been seeing, and hopelessly thinking if it could ever come true in the future.

He never told his friends about the mirror. Not because he was being selfish again, but because he didn't want them to become obsessed with it like he had. It was only after he stopped visiting it that he realised he had been neglecting his friends, and his grades had been slipping, and no matter how much he wanted to, he didn't go back to the mirror. That year anyway...

**A/N: This was just a very quick thing that I wrote in about half an hour, so I know it's not the best. I just liked the idea of writing about something to do with Remus seeing what his life would be like if he wasn't a werewolf. Oh, and I put the ending like that so I could do a second chapter if I wanted to, something about Remus going back to the mirror in his sixth year maybe? Please tell me what you thought :)**


	2. Chapter 2

Year 2

Although nearly exactly a year had passed since Remus first visited the mirror of erised, he hadn't forgotten about it. It wasn't as if he was still obsessed by it like he had been in his first year here, he had simply pushed it to the back of his thoughts, for other things had been happening. For example, James had began his obsession with Lily, which resulted in him spending many an evening telling Remus, Sirius and Peter about her. Also, and this worried him, Remus had a feeling that his friends were getting closer to discovering his secret, so he had been thinking about ways to put them off the track. Remus, Sirius, James and Peter had become closer than ever, and often, Remus had thought about telling them what he actually was. Just as he would pluck up the courage, he would sit them down and say that he had something to tell them, a niggling voice inside of him would whisper _'Who are you kidding? Of course they won't accept you, just think of what used to happen when you were younger, that's what it will be like, except worse.' _He knew it would be worse. There would be no way he could stay at Hogwarts and the only friends he's really had would be disgusted at him. So, he settled for miserably saying his mother was ill again, and he had to go visit her. It killed him to lie to his friends, but he convinced himself that it was better this way, that if he told the truth he'd have no friends.

He gave his friends the excuse that he was going to the library. It was a realistic one, for he often travelled to the deep sanction of the library, sometimes to study, but other times just to space out on his own. Remus also knew that they probably wouldn't go looking for him, as they detested the library, saying it was 'too quiet', so he was safe on that account.

Blowing uselessly on his hands, he cursed at the fact it was such a long way away. Christmas was fast approaching, and so, to take his mind off the cold, he began to plan what presents to get the others. Peter would be easy, just get him something sweet and he would be happy. James would also be easy to buy for, something from Zonko's in which he could try out on Snape, or some of the teachers. Then again, Remus always felt guilty when Snape was pranked, and trying to stop it was always ineffective; once James and Sirius set their minds to something it's unbelievably difficult to stop them. Sirius was a bit trickier. Remus didn't particularly want to get Sirius something meaningless.

Thoughts back to the room that he was aiming for, his hands went out to the side, tracing the cool, stone walls that would lead him to the old classroom. After a few more minutes, his now frozen hands felt the desired door, and so he pushed it open to reveal the familiar room, and golden rimmed mirror which loomed in the corner.

Things had changed since the last time he entered this room, looked into the giant mirror, yet at the same time he wasn't sure that in himself he felt much different. This is why as he settled down into the spot in front of the mirror, and slowly raised his eyes to see his heart's desire, at his first glance, he thought he was seeing the same thing as last year. That's what he had presumed. Except, as the mirror took more of his attention, he knew that things had changed, and this really was what he wanted at that moment, more than anything.

It started out the same as last time; with him, James, Sirius and Peter sat together and laughing. The moon then rose, a full moon, and Remus noticed that the Remus figure inside the mirror was beginning to change. Even though he knew it wasn't real, Remus' body tensed up, fully expecting his friends to run from him, but not be quick enough. However, after the agonising transformation, in which Remus had been flinching throughout, it turned out to be nearly as painful to watch then to actually go through it, the werewolf didn't move, he just lay there. In addition, the marauders neither ran from him nor even look at him with horror or fear. Instead, as they looked at him, the Remus watching saw… acceptance? Understanding? He sat there for a while before a deep sigh broke the tranquilised scene, and he was shocked to find it had come from himself. His battered watch showed that it was time to go, for Remus had been sat there an hour.

Scrambling to his feet, he felt for the door in the darkened room. With a last glance behind him, he set off back to the dormitory, with the thought '_See you next year…'_

**_A/N: Read and review! You've probably guessed now that I'm planning to do a chapter for every year in which Remus is at Hogwarts. I'll probably be updating this story more than my other one (What if- a time travelling fic) as I'm having a bit of a writers block for that one, so expect more chapters soon :)_**


	3. Chapter 3

Year 3

Remus and his father had never seen eye to eye. That was putting it lightly, because in reality, Remus knew that his father hated him for what he had become: a werewolf. Therefore, when the time came for Remus to come to Hogwarts for the first time, his father took him by the shoulders and spat into his face "do not tell anyone what you are. We don't particularly need you disgracing the family anymore." Remus used to be frightened of things like this, but at that point, he simply glared at his father a walked onto the train.

Remus's mother on the other hand was pretty much the opposite. She cared for Remus, even if he felt she was a little bit overprotective, and he was grateful for that. She did not think of him as a half-breed, she simply saw him as her son, staying with him through thick and thin. However, for the past few years, she had been quite ill with something that healers were unable to diagnose. It broke Remus's heart to see her like that, and especially when he had to lie to his friends by saying he was visiting her every full moon. It was such a relief when they found out he was a werewolf and accepted him.

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><p>"Here comes the post!" James noticed as the owls began to swoop over everyone's heads in the Great Hall. "Reckon you'll get another howler Sirius? It's been a while since the last one."<p>

Sirius grimaced slightly at the thought of yet another letter projecting his mother's screaming voice out for everyone to hear. A letter dropped in front of James, and he opened it to find a long letter from his parents with a gift attached.

"They've just got back from a holiday to China ." James explained, as he tried to work out what his gift actually was.

Almost all the owls had disappeared when another one flew over Remus, dropping an envelope into his bowl of cereal. Shaking off the milk, he opened the soggy seal and squinted slightly to make out the unfamiliar scrawl.

_Remus,_

_See me after breakfast in my office._

_Professor Dumbledore_

_P.S. I like Fizzing Whizzbees._

"What's that Moony?" Sirius was peering over his shoulder to read the inscription, so there was no way he could hide it from them.

Sighing deeply, Remus replied "Professor Dumbledore wants to see me in his office after breakfast. But what do you think the P.S. bit means? He likes Fizzing Whizzbees?"

"I reckon it's the password." James answered

"Yeah, he always has a type of sweet as his password," Sirius joined in. Remus knew that would be correct, for they tended to spend a lot of time in Dumbledore's office nowadays.

"Ok, well I'm gonna go now. I'll speak to you later." Remus headed off to Dumbledore's office, a slight feeling of dread rising in his stomach. What had he done to be sent there?

"Fizzing Whizzbees" He said to the statue, and seconds later the passageway to the office was free to go through. Remus timidly knocked on the door before a rumbling voice told him to enter.

"Ah Remus, please sit." The old wizard motioned for Remus to sit in the chair opposite, which he complied to do. Dumbledore's eyes showed sadness, which only increased the horrible feeling in Remus's stomach.

"I'm afraid I have some bad news for you. Last night, your mother took a drastic turn for the worse and she passed away at seven this morning. I have only just received the news, I am so sorry."

Remus sat there, perfectly still, unable to move, speak, do anything.

"I have arranged for you to go home for a few days, and be with your father. I think it best if you pack a few things and meet me here when you're ready. Ok?"

Remus nodded mutely and rose slowly and shakily out of the chair. His legs moved of their own accord heading towards the dormitory where his bed lay waiting for him.

It was only as he left the office that the tears began to fall. He did not care who saw them, did not really notice them. All he knew was that she was gone.

"Remus?" exclaimed Sirius as a figure came bursting through the fat lady portrait, almost running for the dormitory. Frowning, he followed Remus up the stairs where he found him sat on his bed, staring into his lap, tears falling slowly from his face.

"Hey, hey, what's wrong? What did Dumbledore say?" He tried to sooth the crying boy by rubbing circles on his back, but Sirius doubted that Remus even knew he was there.

"My mum." A husky voice ran out across the dormitory. "Sh-she…last night…" No more words followed those as Remus buried his head into Sirius, who had caught on to what he was trying to say.

"Sh, it's ok-"

Sirius was cut off as Remus remembered, "I need to pack! I'm supposed to meet Dumbledore to go home…" He broke off again, so Sirius lay him on the bed and began to pack for him. Within a few minutes, he had finished.

"Ok, I've finished, do you want me to walk with you to Dumbledore's office?"

Remus shook his head "No thanks, I'll go on my own if that's ok." With a nod from Sirius, Remus hauled his backpack onto one shoulder and slowly started for the office.

He had been walking for a while, when a door caught the corner of his eye. One that looked like inside would be an abandoned classroom but Remus knew better. Opening the door, he breathed in the musty air and looked to the corner, where there sat a gigantic mirror. It had been just over a year since he had sat in front of this mirror, and around two years since the first time he had visited this room. He remembered how he had become gripped by it, and so vowed to only visit it once a year, maximum.

The image appeared as soon as he looked at it. With a gasp, Remus realised that he and his dad were sat on a bench in the field behind his house talking. His father made a joke and Remus could see the people in the mirror laughing at it. He was so transfixed by these people that it took him a while to notice that there was another person in the image. Looking closer, he felt a jolt when he realised it was his mum. She was standing quite far in the background, smiling appreciatively at the fact that Remus and his father were talking and laughing together. Seeing her looking so happy made him feel guilty at the fact that he and his father weren't close.

Sighing, he stood up, wiped a stray tear from his eye and made his way to Dumbledore's office where he would go home. He was going to make up with his father, show him that he was still his son. After all, he was partly to blame. Maybe they could move forward and become closer. Not maybe. Definitely.

**A/N: Hope you enjoy this chapter! I know I'm being so mean to Remus I'm sorry! But the chapter won't be so sad, I don't think. Anyway, read and review :)**


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